Give Feedback that Helps, not Hurts
Writing constructive feedback but also not hurting the other person
I have given and received constructive feedback and to be honest these are the feedbacks which let you grow. I know how I felt when I received constructive feedback for the first time, I hated the person who gave it and thought they were against my growth. Took me a while to realize that they were on my team.
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I love the quote below:
Criticism, like rain, should be gentle enough to nourish growth without destroying his roots.
Start with a Genuine Compliment
Begin by giving an honest compliment related to the person's work or intention to create an open atmosphere for feedback.
Avoid superficial compliments and challenge yourself to find something meaningful.
Collect examples where the person helped you or impressed you. Make sure to mention these as well in feedback
Check Your Bias
Reflect on your motives for providing feedback to ensure it's not driven by personal judgments or an obsessive need for control.
Avoid imposing unrealistic standards on others that you cannot meet yourself. If you can’t meet the standard yourself, it is not reasonable to expect from others.
We all have biases but it should not affect someone’s career growth. Be very careful and think twice before writing feedback driven by your biases.
Assume Good Intent
Everyone is trying their best to succeed. When you write feedback, assume good intent and rather than writing “They did not do xyx”, you can write “They can do more of xyz”.
Offer constructive suggestions for improvement in a calm, nonjudgmental manner, assuming effort and good intentions.
Focus on Improvements
Give examples on what the person could have done more of, how they can improve in future and tell them how you would love to collaborate with them in future.
Keep your feedback focused on the work itself rather than attacking the person's character and choices.
End on a positive note
Mention how you enjoyed working with them and would love to work together again.
Mention you see a bright future ahead and very excited to see the person improve upon the areas mentioned and excel at future projects
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Love the quote! I also consider giving feedback is nourishing, but more like when a gardener keeps the garden tidy by cleaning the weeds so the crops can grow.
I love receiving and giving candid feedback while assuming some of your points, like Assuming good intent and checking my bias. But giving compliments for me happens at a different stage. As someone who codes and looks at many PRs daily, I know those are the places where compliments are best expressed.
Great insights, Hemant! Your approach to feedback is not just constructive but also empathetic. The analogy of criticism being like rain, gentle enough to nourish growth without destroying roots, is spot on. Starting with a genuine compliment and focusing on improvement sets a positive tone for collaboration. Your emphasis on assuming good intent reflects a mature understanding of the human aspect in professional growth. Ending on a positive note, expressing a desire for future collaboration, is a fantastic way to motivate and encourage. Your tips are practical and applicable, making feedback a tool for collective success.